Tuesday, June 14, 2011

May 27th Journal Entry

Friday. I have no freedom, never have had any, possibly I will never have freedom. How can I say such a thing when I live in the land of the free and the home of the brave?
Each and every string of proteins, near proteins, string of amino acids, and every seemingly random grouping of carbon and many non-carbon atoms draw together into clusters. The whole universe seems  drawn into clusters. Altruistic motions and behaviors always arise. The whole of reality strives toward union with and combination with each part, all of its parts. Freedom as a concept implies some form of independence. Such independence may have existed in the instant before the first Big Bang, but it is not present anywhere now.
Daddy, even if you did not exist in that pre-bang instant, you are destined to exist in the future. The evolving, clustering, thinking, sharing cosmos must form you. Daddy, if you did exist then and decreed the tremendous Bang then all that is is destined to form another like you. You and she will then think, share and become one.
In that I am a part of your creation, loved by you, nurtured by you and drawn always toward sharing, I will indeed become (somewhere in time and space) your bride. We will be one and right now we are one. I am not free, in that I am not independent, I do not wish to be.
Daddy, I love you, always, even when I think I can run away.

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